Oh the dilemma faced by almost every guy on the Earth! You really like a girl but she is dating someone else. Before you make up your mind to ask a girl for yourself make sure to ask a girl out if she is already dating.You think that she is the one for you but how can you tell her that when she does not even know you are into her. Well, what you need to do is follow a few steps towards finding out what her relationship with her guy is like. Does it seem to be going somewhere serious or are they on the lookout while dating each other? You will need to follow one or all of the following steps to ask her out.
Maybe one of these works for you!
1. Try to find out how Serious She is about the Person She’s Dating
You will have to find out if she is actually serious about the guy she is dating or not. Once you have clarified her dating situation, you might be able to analyze asking her out in a more objective way. Are they dating casually? Or are they in an exclusive relationship? The easiest way to find out is to ask directly “Do you have a boyfriend?” or “Are you single?” If she says she doesn’t have a boyfriend, or that she is single, just ask her out normally. Just because she’s gone on a few dates with someone doesn’t mean she can’t go on a date with someone else.
If she’s in a relationship, one thing you can do is be bold and ask her if she’s happy. This can actually backfire so you will need to strategize a little bit. You could ask her if she’s in love. If she hesitates you can ask her out but make sure that you don’t cross the line with her. There are two approaches that you can try:
A. The Subtle Hint
“Hey! I noticed that you don’t look perfectly happy with your guy, I don’t mean to overstep but I’d really like to take you out for coffee. I just want to know you better and I want you to know me too. I promise it will just be a platonic cup of coffee. Just to get to know each other. If you find my proposition wrong, you can just say no”.
B. The Bold Approach
“Hey! I know I may be crossing the line here but I really think we ought to be together. You don’t seem happy in your current relationship. I really like you and would love for you to know me better. I promise I am not going to make any moves on you but would you like to go out for a drink with me?”
Another straightforward way to ask her out is to just give her your contact information. This is the direct approach. Just tell her that in case things don’t work out between that guy and her she should feel free to call you. If she’s loyal to her relationship, or simply not interested, she’ll throw your contact information away. But if she’s interested, and her relationship is on the rocks, she might get in touch after they break. Just think of it this way: you’ve done no harm by trying. This is also the safest approach because in this case you are not doing any direct harm and cannot be held responsible for her breakup.
2. Don’t get Trapped in the Friend Zone
If the girl you like is dating someone else don’t assume that you if you become friends with her you will have a better chance of getting to date her once things spiral downwards in her current relationship. Make your romantic intentions clear to her. She should know that you wish she was your girlfriend so that in case, things don’t work out with her boyfriend you would love to take her out.
The silliest mistake that boys make with an unavailable girl is that they become her ‘friend’ and then when she actually breaks up with her boyfriend; she doesn’t even consider them an option for her.
3. Don’t Accept a Cheating Girlfriend
If you have real feelings for this girl, you need to make them clear to her. If she tells you that she cannot break up wither boyfriend but she is okay dating you as well, you are in trouble. Put your foot down and let her know that for anything to ensue between you two, she will have to get the other guy out of her life. If she really likes you she will break up with the guy and come to you. If she is ready to ‘cheat’ on her boyfriend with you, you might just be next. You might be okay with this in the beginning but trust me; you are just digging a grave for your own relationship.
Before you go about pursuing the girls of your dreams, here are a few things that you must keep in mind:
- If you have just met the girl and don’t know her too well, it will be very silly to get too attached to her. Show her your interest but don’t take her disinterest in you to heart.
- Be attractive. You should pay attention on how you look and conduct yourself in front of others. You need to come across as the cool, confident and breezy person that you are.
- Don’t be her go to guy. This means that you don’t have to be the person she runs to when she is in trouble with her boyfriend. You will end up in the dreaded friend zone faster than you know it if she knows that you are interested in wiping her tears.
- Do other things with your life that doesn’t involve her. Even if it’s taking up an unfamiliar sport, do it for yourself. Don’t move on if she doesn’t seem interested; make sure you actually know that she doesn’t want this relationship with you.
- You will need to ensure that she is single before you start dating her. This is in case you really want her to be yours and not see other guys on the side! Girls usually take too much time in deciding what they want. Tell her you are ready to be patient and to wait for her to be single before taking any steps in the relationship further.
- If she tells you straight to your face that she is happy in her relationship with the current boyfriend, you need to respect this. Tell her “call me if you are ever single”. Then let her call you in that case.
- If you come to realize that she is actually happy with the guy she is dating, don’t be overly persistent. Wish her all the luck and respect her decision. Give her the space and time she deserves.